最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话

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最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话

　　生活中怎么能少了笑话来调味一下我们乏味枯燥的日常呢?一则搞笑的小笑话就能让我们原本苦恼的心情立刻变得像春天的鲜花一样灿烂，小编为你准备了非常搞笑的英语笑话，希望你的生活像夏日的阳光一样!

最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话

　　最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话 1

　　Are Flies Yummy?

　　Tony and his father are eating dinner.

　　Suddenly Tony asks his father, "Dad, are flies yummy?"

　　Dad frowns and says, "No, I think its yucky. Why do you ask me this question? Its a silly question."

　　But Tony says, "There was one fly in your plate."

　　托尼正和他爸爸一起吃晚餐。

　　突然，托尼问他的爸爸：“爸爸，苍蝇好吃吗?”

　　爸爸皱眉说：“我想不好吃。你怎么会问这个问题?这可是一个愚蠢的问题。”

　　可是托尼说：“刚才你盘子里有一只苍蝇。”

　　最搞笑的`愚人节英语笑话 2

　　Where are the tails? 尾巴哪去了?

　　The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours, then he started again, and said he: "Let me ask the evolutionist a question -- if we had tails like a baboon1, where are they?"

　　"Ill venture an answer," said an old lady, "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".

　　教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的'话题又来了：“让我向进化论者提个问题——如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了?”

　　“我来试试看，”一位老太太说， “该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”

　　最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话 3

　　It Must Be Crowded 一定很拥挤

　　A teacher is telling his students, "The moon is very large. Several millions people can live there."

　　And a boy laughs and says, "It must get crowded when its a crescent moon."

　　一位告诉学生：“月亮非常大，上面能住几百人。”

　　一个男孩笑着说：“当月亮变成月牙的`时候，住在上面的人该多拥挤啊!”

　　最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话 4

　　a guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan。

　　he asks, "what was that for?"

　　she says, "i found a piece of paper in your pocket with betty sue written on it."

　　he says, "jeez, honey, betty sue was the name of the horse i bet on." she shrugs and walks away。

　　three days later hes reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan。

　　he asks, "what was that for?"

　　she answers, "your horse called."

　　一个家伙正在看报纸，他的妻子走到他身后，用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺。他问道：“这是为什么?”她说：“我在你口袋里发现了一张写有‘betty sue’的纸条。”他说：“哎呀，亲爱的，‘betty sue’是我赌的那匹马的'名字。”她耸了耸肩，走了。三天后他正在看报纸，妻子走到他身后，又用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺。他问：“这又是为什么?”她答道：“你的马打电话来了。”

　　最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话 5

　　a man was hit by a cab in the street. he was brought to the hospital。

　　his wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "i think that he is very ill."

　　"i am afraid that he is dead." said the doctor。

　　hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "i"m not dead. i"m still alive."

　　"be quiet, " said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"

　　一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院。他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说：“我想他伤得很厉害。”

　　医生说：“恐怕他已经死了。”

　　听到医生的话，这个男人转动着头说：“我没死，我还活着。”

　　妻子说：“安静，医生比你懂得多。”

　　最搞笑的`愚人节英语笑话 6

　　one day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. the city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. the city man said to the farmer," i see that your pig likes apples, but isnt that quite a waste of time?" the farmer replied," whats time to a pig?"

　　一天，有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村，在乡间路上开着车，想看看农庄是什么样子，也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。这位城里人看见一位农夫在宅后的草地上，手中抱着一头猪，并把它举得高高的，好让它能够吃到树上的

　　苹果。城里人对农夫说，"我看你的猪挺喜欢吃苹果的，但是，这不是很浪费时间吗?"那位农夫回答说，"时间对猪有什么意义?"

　　will and bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger man. will said, “well, you know the pacific ocean ? my fathers the one who dug the hole for it。”

　　bill wasnt impressed, “well, thats nothing. you know the dead sea ? my fathers the one who killed it!”

　　威尔和比尔在为谁的.父亲更强壮而争吵。威尔说：“喏，你知道太平洋吗?就是我爸爸为它挖的洞。”

　　比尔不屑一顾：“噢，那没什么。你知道死海吗?那是我爸爸杀死的。”

　　最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话 7

　　"You cant imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife," the man complained to his friend. "She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.

　　可怜的丈夫

　　“你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难，”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说，“她问我一个问题，然后自己回答了，过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的.。”

　　Whos More Polite?

　　A fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite. The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. But the fat man knew he was more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.

　　谁更有礼貌?

　　一个胖子和一个瘦子在争论谁更有礼貌。瘦子说他更有礼貌，因为他经常对女士摘帽示意。但是胖子认为他更有风度，因为无论什么时候他在车上给别人让座时，总有两位女士能坐下。

　　最搞笑的愚人节英语笑话 8

　　When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"

　　"I wasnt asleep," the man answered.

　　"Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed."

　　"I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."

　　我没有睡着

　　当一群妇女上车之后，车上的.座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了，他担心这个人会坐过站，就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他，说：“先生，醒醒!”

　　“我没有睡着。”那个男人回答。

　　“没睡着?可是你眼睛都闭上了呀?”

　　“我知道，我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。”